My mother used to hate Mother’s Day.
For a long while I adopted my Mom’s attitude – but one day, a couple of years before my mother died, I decided I deserved Mother’s Day. Hell, after raising other people’s children, and being “like” a mother to many – I earned it. And my mother deserved it more than I.
By the time I re-intended Mother’s Day, my daughter and those around me were so used to my “Mother’s Day Bashing” I had to turn that ship around and literally make a declaration: “I want to celebrate Mother’s Day, dammit!”
In my opinion, Mother’s Day should be a national friggin’ holiday. If you are a mother, you know exactly what I mean. I know this now, especially now that my mother is no longer in the flesh and while I mother my 25-year-old daughter and 15-year-old son.
All mothers should be honored.
All “wanna be” mothers should be honored.
All “would’ve been”, “almost” mothers should be honored.
Think about it: You have to be a special person to raise your hand for this job, ‘cuz raising children is the ultimate blind sacrifice. You never know what you are going to get. No kids come with instruction manuals.
And if you are parenting someone else’s children – you may have imagined what it would be like, but NOTHING could’ve prepared you for the heightened level of “adulting”.
Does this mean that all mothers are honorable?
No – but from my experience – they do the best they can with the tools they were given from their mothers.
Right or wrong, saints or sinners – they are the reason we are who and where we are today.
I’m not talking blame here. I’m talking survival. Our opportunity is to break the undesirable links to the past to create brighter futures for ourselves and others.
So – If you have/had a great mother – honor her with a walk down memory lane. Express your gratitude.
If you have a narcissistic (selfish) mother – recognize your greatness and resourcefulness having had that experience. Allow your Spirit to thank her Spirit – while giving yourself permission to feel your feelings. Put your big girl/boy underwear on and take full responsibility for now…. and beyond.
Most importantly – Mother Yourself today. Self-care is an important part of a mother’s tool-kit – one we all need to use more often.
Celebrate the healing maternal dynamic between your inner child and your older, wiser self.
Happy Mother’s Day to you!